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Calista Ocean

What if I'm the obstacle?


"Success is to be measured not so much by the position one has reached in life as by the obstacles which he has overcome."

~ Booker T. Washington, American educator, author and orator


Like many, I’ve always found it easier to look outward, to identify external barriers that seem to impede my progress toward achieving my aspirations. It’s natural, right?


Initially, this question surfaced for me in my meditation practices with Ganesha, the Hindu deity known for removing obstacles. Ganesha, with his elephant head and playful demeanor, has an incredible sense of humor. In some of my visualizations, I’ve observed Ganesha physically picking me up and moving me out of my own way, a gentle yet profound reminder that sometimes the obstacles we perceive are self-created.


Think about it. How often do we allow our mindset and beliefs to put up invisible walls around us? We get so caught up in what we think we can’t do that we never really explore what we might be capable of. Our thoughts may limit our potential more than any external barrier ever could.


For instance, it took me more than a decade to begin re-writing the first draft of my novel, In Peril. I often blamed the delay on writer’s block, the demands of my career, and a general lack of time. While all these factors were indeed real, the greater obstacle was my focus on these limitations rather than finding creative ways to carve out time for the re-writing process.


Another significant self-created obstacle is a lack of self-care. It’s easy to fall into the trap of neglecting our physical and emotional well-being in the pursuit of our goals. This often leads to burnout and a loss of motivation, making it harder to stay on track. I’ve been there, running on fumes, thinking that pushing through willpower alone would get me to the finish line. It doesn’t. It’s like trying to drive a car on an empty tank—you’re bound to stall.


Sometimes reluctance to seek out knowledge and learning can be another form of self-sabotage. We may avoid acquiring new skills or information due to the fear of failure or the belief that we’re not capable of understanding complex concepts. This resistance to growth only serves to keep us stuck in place.


And then there’s fear. Fear of failure, fear of judgment, fear of the unknown—these are powerful deterrents that can paralyze us into inaction. In my visualizations with Ganesha, I often ask him to remove these fears, both the ones I’m aware of and those lurking in the shadows. Every time, he humorously moves me out of my own path, as if to say, “The only obstacle standing in your way is you.”


So, how do I address this? How do I know when I'm actually the obstacle? To begin with, I think it's important to take time to journal and meditate in order to self-reflect and uncover patterns.


When I do notice signs that I'm getting in may own way, I try to avoid self-blame and see it as an invitation to explore the ways I might be hindering my own progress and to take proactive steps to move beyond these self-imposed barriers. By doing so, I open up new possibilities for growth, fulfillment, and the realization of my aspirations.


May you find your own way through the obstacles in your life. May they be few and far between. May you have the wisdom and courage to step out of your own way when you need to. May you be happy and well.

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